Do any of you ever reach a point in your day, when despite everyone's needs for you to do something for them, or maybe the chores are backing up, or the million things you should be doing, you shut down and pull away and go find a place to be alone and unwind.
I find I need Me time to stay sane, a place to go to, to read a book, or some computer time, time to be with me...... Sounds selfish I know...
Not selfish at all don't know anyone that doesn't need some time to just relax and clear there head. Uggh--I hear ya--I'm in an open room (Radiology Reading Room) whereyou said it! i need lots of 'me time'. in fact the more stressed i am, the more i feel the need to escape from all the overstimulation. the more going on inside my head, the greater the need for a safe environment. when i'm stressed i'm a little more impulsive and i hate for others, or myself, to suffer the consequences of my gaps in self-control. (my mood shifts, low frustration tolerance, unedited speech..).
like many i have read of, i more often than not have to plan what i'm going to say, how i'm going to respond, and rehearse it in my mind. if i don't, i am probably going to embarass myself, if someone else. that's another valuable aspect to 'me time'.
I think "me time" is very important to people with ADD.[QUOTE=boggled]oh, yes. I spend the day at work where people constantly need something from me, then I go home and my family is in constant need of something....something to eat, clean clothes, help with this or that...........and then there are the pets and there is housework that just does not end. By 9 at night I just shut down. Nothing else gets done that day. My husband now knows better than to ask for more than one or two favors after 9 pm, but he still grumbles that I "never make snacks for him anymore". [/QUOTE]
That's weird, people at my office constantly need something from me, even thoguh I don't get to be the manager =/
In response to this topic, I always need me time lol. Growing up I had an older brother but he was always demanding the attention from mom and dad so i grew up and kept quiet, entertaining myself. I would play games by myself, etc. I was able to entertain myself very easily. My brother was not. He had to get mom and dads attention and so I would just stay out of the way. I look back, in some ways it was soo hard because my brother was loud, aggressive, pushy, mean to me, since I'm the youngest and just wanted all the attention from my parents. But, I do like time to myself, always have, and so things were okay. My brother and I get a long much better now that we are older. he's so funny and outgoing. I think most brothers and sisters bond when they get older and become adults. It is wonderful!Anyway, nowdays I'm always doing stuff to entertain myself still. Never got out of that habit lol. During the day I'll have "me time" and just "attempt" to read a interesting book, or get on the computer or watch a movie....in between studying. it's great. At night, I'll hang out with my fiance and do whatever he wants or work when scheduled. I think that everybody should have time to themselves and be able to do what they want. And seeker, the same thing happens to me.I always have to plan what to say, how to respond to people and rehearse it in my mind. I'm at a loss for words if i dont sometimes. (I have some social anxiety).Oh I strongly believe that ADD'ers need way more 'alone' time than the average person. Or maybe they just need way less 'people' time.
I think I have about 3 hours total of actually human, face to face contact a day during my work week and even less on weekends. I've never been happier or calmer.
I used to be married and had a job with 40 employees in a facility with 200 staff and 100 residents. I was miserable, constantly anxious, never calm, rarely happy.
I now have the perfect job....and my social life is decent, though way smaller than what many people consider 'normal'.
But there are people who really freak out about being alone, even for short spans of time! Or they say things like "but your ALONE!" like, well, I have two heads!
Or worse...those who crowd in on me, or won't leave me alone because they think I 'need to be around people'. I can remember trying to leave a function because I was upset and the woman there (well meaning, but WRONG) kept saying "I won't let you leave! You need PEOPLE right now!"
I do like people....just in very small doses. And when I am unhappy, hurt, sad, anxious, exhausted etc...I ususally prefer to be left completely alone...thankyouverymuch.
Sorta like those folks who can only handle very small amounts of daylight....that is how I see ADD'ers with other humans...we really are way happier with WAY less than other folks need to feel good.
And what is good for them is misery for us.