Really needing advice | ADHD Information

    Well, I am kind of having a situation. To make a long story short, I was at a friends house about a week ago, and I was having a easy going conversation with a person there. During the discussion, he mentioned his ADD. I nonchalantly asked what are the symptoms of ADD. I was a bit suprised when everything that he listed I also experience. Well, this conversation piqued my interest, and the next day I began to research the disorder on the internet. I was suprised to learn that there are two different forms of ADHD: an inattentive type, and a hyperactive type. I always disregarded ADHD as a possible reason for my problems because I do not show much hyperactivity (although I do exhibit the fidgeting symptom). However, when I looked at the innattentive type symptoms, I exhibited all of them. I was shocked to say the least. I began to fervently research the topic. With every web page, I found myself answering yes to these symptoms of innattentive type ADHD. I have always lived with constantly forgetting things, not be able to pay attention in class, never being able to focus on a project for an extended period of time, and etc.

    So, I went to my college counselor in hopes of finding out if I actually might have this disorder. After about a forty minute session, she concluded that I didn't have the disorder. THe reason that she gave for ruling out innattentive type ADD was that I was able to have a focused, on-topic conversation with her during our session. Now, my question for you all is do you agree with her? Can you, as people with adult ADHD, hold an on-topic conversation with someone for that amount of time? Is this outside of the scope of an adult with innattentive ADD?

    I am just really needing some advice as whether or not to keep pursuing this and seeking a second opinion.

Jag, let me just also add also that there are plenty of ad/hders out there that can hold a conversation for that amount of time and still have ad/hd. For her to use THAT ONE thing as the sole basis for her opinion to you proves how little she knows about ad/hd. As a matter of fact, most adult ad/hders have come to learn how to carry on conversations...i mean, where does she get off thinking that how you hold a conversation with her for 40 minutes that she can tell right then and there if you have ad/hd???

it makes me mad, because you went in there looking for answers, and she just kinda sent you back out there on your own, with no answers, no help, no referral to some one else, no NOTHING. You could have easily just not bothered to do further research to come to us, and suffered for the rest of your life with possible ad/hd and to suffer from ad/hd and have other people tell you "you're normal, you just need to buckle down", is devastating to your self esteem.

I feel proffesionals need to take it more seriously when some one comes to them and tells them they think they have ad/hd, or whatever else, before they just say "no, i don't think you have it" and send you away.

Am I the only one who thinks that's gross behavior on behalf of a proffessional counselor who is suppose to help you?

You know, Sonya is absolutely right.

Also, maybe through the college in the medical or psych departments they are doing or would do testing for that on you. When those students do that or those studies, they are supervised by great doctors who are also helping to teach or be a part of programs. Odds are it would be not only free but you might even get paid for it. You should ask around or even call your hospitals and ask for those departments, once connected or at the right hospital area, ask if there are studies going on through a local university. They probably wouldn't treat but they might be able to give you something in writing or at least diagnose.

My two cents: I think it's always good to get a second opinion - without giving any details to the second examiner of the first examiner's opinion.

If the examiner doesn't think it's add, what do they think it is?

People that I've seen have sometimes doubted that I have ADD because I can have a conversation or I was tested for other learning disabilities at school and I did really well except on the spelling and attention parts, but those weren't too bad. When I talked to the doctor at school about it she questioned that but I told her that I could focus because it was only for a relatively short period of time and it took a lot of energy for me to be able to do it for that long. She should have also looked for things like fidgeting or moving your foot or your eyes wandering during the conversation. Adults with ADD are usually pretty good at covering it up, especially for short periods of time, because we've been developing coping mechanisms all our lives, some of us just didn't know what we were trying to cope with.

I would get a second opinion if I were you. That doesn't necessarily mean that you do have it, but I think it's worth pursuing.

First of all, let me say, Welcome, Jag02002

Your post has got me a little hotheaded, excuse me while I vent, NOT AT YOU, but in YOUR BEHALF at that "counselor"...

who does she think she is? she obviously has absolutely no idea what she is talking about. Just because you can have a conversation with her for 40 minutes, what, is she basing her WHOLE "DIAGNOSIS" on THAT one fact?

PEOPLE, WE GOT ANOTHER SELF PROCLAIMED "EXPERT" HERE WHO THINK THEY KNOW ABOUT AD/HD and are SUPPOSED TO BE HELPING OTHERS, AND YET THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THEY TALKING ABOUT, and they are CONTINUALLY GIVING WRONG INFO ABOUT AD/HD TO UNKNOWING PEOPLE WHO ARE EARNESTLY LOOKING FOR ANSWERS, LIKE JAG, HERE!! that makes me mad!

(excuse me for getting so frustrated, but I have had something similar happen to me before..)

THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY "PROFFESSIONALS" OUT THERE WHO THINK THEY KNOW ALL ABOUT AD/HD, AND THEY DON'T!!...anyone who knows anything about ad/hd would know to tell you that ad/hd comes in all sorts of sizes shapes and colors. Some of us would be able to carry on a conversation with her, others would not.

But you said she is a college counselor?

Personally Jag, I wouldn't even consider her opinion a good "first" opinion..

Your best bet would be to look up a proffessional that is an expert on adult ad/hd and to talk to them...

I'm sorry for getting so "loud", but i have a special pet peeve for people who are supposed to be "proffessionals" and yet they give out wrong information to honest people seeking answers, such as yourself....don't take me too seriously.

I'd suggest going to a professional who specifically specializes in adhd or other learning disabilities. Often, someone with a broad background just wont recognize it from lack of experience. They'll read a textbook or go to some lectures and only use the information they've picked up there to make a diagnosis.

Often, psychologists who typically work with adhd kids have the most experience in seeing "live" adhd and all its complex symptoms- that's who I went to, and I've had a very good experience.

Being able to focus on a particular conversation doesnt mean squat with adhd- its pretty common to be able to do that. New or unusual situations can often cause a person with adhd to have an increased ability to focus. I'd say that if your counselor wasnt aware of this, she's really not the person appropriate to do an adhd diagnosis- its pretty common knowledge among adhd professionals. This is not a diagnosis. It's a guess. Go to a specialist. They'll give you a bunch of specific tests. Yeah, go see a real Doctor or Specialist. I sometimes can have great focused conversations, but 90% of the time, I can't. Good luck to you.

Being able to hold a conversation like that, in those circumstances, is not unusual for ADHDers. Stressful situations get our adrenaline flowing, which in turn wakes up those neurotransmitters that seem to be the cause of ADHD in the first place.

Ignore the college counselor, she's full of it.

Mark -

i agree the "diagnosis" isn't a stopper and the person making it is likely unqualified to do it.
the therapist who saw me for diagnosis really remarked on how I DIDN"T hold a coherent on topic convo. But I can certainly see adreniline or whatever keeping someone on topic. I didn't want to see him and I was sort of tuning him out.
I agree with everyone else - get another opinion.

The "novelty" of sitting in a doctor's office is more than enough stimulation to allow you to focus on a conversation for 40 minutes. I spent that amount of time with a psychiatrist last month, without fidgeting or anything, because it was a new experience and I was most definitely "on the spot", which makes my nerves run high anyway. I got an ADD diagnosis.

Look for a professional who has experience with AD/HD.

Jag,

I'm the exact same way. I am very inattentive and impulsive and only fidget....no hyperactivity really besides that. It sounds to me like you really do have it and that doctor was nuts! I agree with Sonya. Your doctor gave you no answers whatsoever and based her answer on one thing. how foolish! Yes, I agree that you should get a second opinion definitely, but I'm pretty sure you have ADD because I'm a lot like you. I probably have more impulsivity though lol. I however have a very hard time focusing on a conversation for a length of time without interrupting and being random. I'm a very random person. Whatever I think of I usually say out of the blue. lol. I need to work on that! Even with meds! I would probably be sitting there fidgeting too but i don't know. I would be interested in her responses. I dont know if i could stay focused all that time or not to be honest. If I'm interested in what she's saying yeah probably but sometimes I daydream if it gets boring so i dont know. As far as reading, i love to read my romance books. But, I still can't always focus. I started reading earlier and I think my concerta is wearing off for the day. Anyway, I had to re read the page 3 times to make sense of it. I kept thinking about something else when reading yikes lol. When I can concentrate, I do enjoy it though. I get adrenaline when I go to my doctor as well and I don't know if that is good or bad. Sometimes i get knots in my stomach and just find it hard to think and listen.

I agree with every1 as well. Not every person w/ ADD is exactly the same, and depending on what is going on in our lives (or at the moment), how ADD effects us varies as well.

I had a counselor tell me I didn't have ADD because I liked to read...(well, how I read is impacted by my ADD...there are many factors there.) Some1's opinion and a "real" Dr that understands ADD are 2 very different things.

We'd all be in a lot more trouble if we were never able to have a decent conversation...LoL. And anytime we are excited about something, it's easier to focus on...while it's exciting at least, LoL. I know when I am able to focus, I run circles around people in all I get done.

my doctor wouldn't easily accept me having add because he thought i was bi-polar. i could be bi-polar if you take out the manic part.

he thought bi-polar mostly because i sometimes have trouble sleeping. about every 2-3 mos., more freq. when extra stressed, i stay up too late 2 or 3 nights in a row,getting only 2 or 3 hours of sleep, the last night being an all-nighter. time flies esp. after that second night of insomnia. so, about every 3 mos. i stay awake 30 to 48 hrs.until i exhaust myself. i'm not sure why it happens.

anyway, after writing a sort of informal case study on what my concerns were, he prescribed first straterra, then wellbutrin. add is tricky and many doctors are a little skeptical about prescribing for it because now everybody wants ritalin and dexedrine.and not always for good reasons.

[QUOTE=flyingwoman]

According to the many websites on ADHD and ADD:

Everyone to a certain extent displays all or most of the adhd symptoms. It is only when the symptoms are so severe that you have major problems with school work, socail live and and or work life that you have ADHD or ADD. You must also have had these severe symptoms before the age of seven. It is much easier to diagnose ADHD than ADD, because many disorders, such as depression, mimic ADD.

Unless the topic really interests the person with ADHD or ADD, most people with this difference have trouble staying focus. Their conversations' topics usually changes as quickly as they are distracted.

Most normal people will experiences ADHD and ADD symptoms when they are under stress. For ADHDers, these symptoms do not appear only when under stress. They are always there.

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Let us know when you get to the websites that talk about how a person can learn coping skills, manage their condition, or take medications to even help them not appear as some goofy looking weirdo with no friends or respect. Or, you can fill us in when you actually meet legit diagnosed SUCCESSFUL people in society with it who manage it, understand it, work on their challenged areas, and are a contributing factor to having a loving yet funner and more exciting family--differences and all.

You keep on researching and I know you'll find that out there. I have faith in you.

Some here have it and have had serious problems through life because they have not been officially diagnosed or even properly treated with meds and counseling, but some have been treated and get the right help.

I can absolutely understand the heartache and anger that some have with this, especially not being able to get the right help and that's PROBABLY due to not being able to access or afford the right help from the right doctors, which will most certainly make a difference. In some countries, some don't even deal with it yet.

This condition, ESPECIALLY when one has gone undiagnosed most of their lives will also have a HUGE contribution to even more low self esteem, complications and a self image that go along with that, and more negativity--and for obvious reasons. Things get better, little by little, when a person is properly treated and working with coping skills. There are too many that would agree with that and too many LEGIT adhd examples already. I was just wondering if you got to those websites or research material yet? and I know I sure as hell don't look like a weirdo. I'm sure many other's here don't either.

There are also other factors that add to the complications, and that is not only having ADHD/ADD, but having combined other problems, like depression, bi polar. Not everyone with ADHD has those additional challenges, but some do.

I just have ADHD but other's have that and then some. My children and I were very lucky because we had some serious experts in the field overseeing our evaluations. I also do not surround myself with negative people or people who seem to be constant sinking ships, because it takes away from the positive things in life, but that's me. Not everyone is like that and that's fine.

By the way, I have many real and loving interesting friends and I have ADHD. I've also learned how to manage many of my short comings. Granted, it's an ongoing process but so is life. OH, and I am considered a cool person to hang with, lot's of fun and interesting as well as good hearted, not to mention loyal and very trustworthy--so I've been told many times, and normally I wouldn't mention that but since you're doing research, I thought I would help contribute to your hyperfocused dedication in sharing with everyone who has it and how you pointed out how they should look goofy and have no resepct from other people. Last time I checked, Mark and Floof didn't look like social rejects or mouths hanging open all the time. Did you happen to resarch that yet? Not everyone is able to be outgoing or function the way they would like or interact socially the way they would hope to, but on the other hand, there are those with ADHD that do and can. Nobody should be upset about those difference either. We're all in this together, in spite of our different challenges.

You may have mentioned only SOME aspects of REAL adhd, but you also failed to mention many other characteristics of ADHD--as with tons of other documented information, and I'd go so far as to say that you intentionally leave out many of the good points of it, success stories, or specific other facts.

Some here have self esteem that is pretty low and might not see how your comments are actually more negative and not complete but not everyone with ADHD suffers from excessive low self esteem either--maybe years ago before we even know what was going on. Nothing came to me easy or over night but I chose to do all I could, as best as I could to over come many challenges and not harbor anger for things I cannot change in the past or for experiences that I wish didn't happen, or even for having this condition because through it all, each of us have so many wonderful unique things about us that maybe some don't even realize, but they are there.

Anyone who feels I'm out of place, that's fine too. I'll respect that. It doesn't mean I'll agree with some of it, but I'm certainly able to respect another's point of view and possibly even learn from it.

goldenmoment38471.3830671296Is she just someone with a title of counselor or a real therapist? That makes a difference right there. Check her credentials is what i am trying to say and definetly talk to your doctor to have a Real Opinion done.

Your college counselor is not qualified to diagnose ADD. Go to a real doctor, one who has experience with adult ADD. Then I'd report your counselor for acting negligent by attempting to diagnose a medical condition, which is obviously outside her scope of expertise. What if the next person with ADD who comes to her for 'help' doesn't realize she's full of crap, and never gets a proper diagnosis? I think you have a duty to report her - her arrogance could really harm someone.

[QUOTE=paritthead]

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I totally agree with this...well stated. This is what makes me so mad about this. What if some one else who desperately needs help comes to a "proffessional" such as this and then they get sent away not realizing that the "proffessional" may be incorrect? It makes me mad on behalf of the possible other misinformed ones who may possibly be sent away and just leave it like that...and end up doomed to a hard life not knowing that it could be a bit easier had that "proffessional" not gave them the wrong info....

I also agree with what shock said: read....

Do your own research, I never just settle with what any doctor tells me on ANYTHING be it ad/hd, my dequervain's tendonitis, my pregnancy or ANYTHING! I always do my own research along with what the doctor tells me to make sure we are on the same page, and that the doctor is on point. A lot of people in the little area where I live do not do this, they just take what a doctor tells them as gospel truth, and never bother to just do a little research, be it a quick google search, and just a quick thumb through a book at the library...FOR SOME, THIS HAS COSTED THEM THEIR LIFE! We have a bad medical staff in the area where I live, and though they don't ALWAYS give wrong info, it DOES HAPPEN from time to time, and I recommend to ANYONE, who think they have ANY type of condition to read up on it, and do a quick internet search about just for their own protection.

And if what a doctor tells you conflicts with what research you have done, confront them with it. If they give you some baloney-cocamony explanation that does not sound right, SECOND OPINION!!

I wish more people around me where I lived would do this more often.

sonya_h38470.7017824074

According to the many websites on ADHD and ADD:

Most normal people will experiences ADHD and ADD symptoms when they are under stress. For ADHDers, these symptoms do not appear only when under stress. They are always there.

flyingwoman38470.9860185185Thank you all for the responses. I was unsure of how to proceed, but I will now seek a second opinion from a person that specializes in ADHD.

Thanks
Read and read and read and read all you can about ADD. You will learn a lot about ADD and yourself. I highly recommend it. It has helped me out more then I could ever imagine.