Best friend still doesn’t believe.... | ADHD Information
i think people are ridiculous bcgirl!! it is a real disorder and so many people think it's nothing.If there weren't sooooooooo many fakers out there I think people would be more willing to believe us. My best friend asked me last night how long I had spent with the psychiatrist before he diagnosed me with ADD. I said about 40 minutes, and she said, "he could tell you have ADD after just 40 minutes?? You better get a second opinion on that one".Why do people just refuse to believe in this condition????
I say 4o minutes with a psychiatrist is very good. most of what i have seen when I work with people who see one they are all out in 5-15 minutes tops. I have waited while a psychiatric eval was being done and that was 30 minutes therefore your friend does not know much.When I was evaluated I went through a couple hours of stuff. But after the first 15 minutes, the specialist started laughing and said "oh, you're textbook ADHD." She still went through all the motions but had the diagnosis practically right away. She probably doesn't want to accept that you have ADHD and that is why she wants you to get a second opinion. Why are people so unaccepting? We live in a society where so many people like to pretend there is no problems and go on as usual. I am sick of living that way and I myself can't wait to get help. I have told just a few of my very closest friends and relatives about my new discovery of my ADHD and I am disgusted at most of the responses I have gotten. My sister got mad at me and said, "YOU DON'T HAVE THAT!" Like it was a huge embarrassment or something. She has called me lazy my whole life, so apparently she still thinks I am just lazy. One friend that I told just stared at me like I was a freak. Why can't they be accepting and happy for us that we have finally discovered why we have struggled our whole life. Happy that FINALLY we can find some relief or healing. Hang in there and I am proud of you for going to the Dr.
[QUOTE=bcgirl1978]My best friend asked me last night how long I had spent with the psychiatrist before he diagnosed me with ADD. I said about 40 minutes, and she said, "he could tell you have ADD after just 40 minutes?? You better get a second opinion on that one".
[/QUOTE]
tell her that you were satisfied with your doctors visit and if she wasn't then that's not your problem. and that if you want her opinion you will let her know.
that statement would have ruffled my feathers too.
lol that statement would have ended the friendship for me. Of course I end friendships very easily so thats probably not a good option for most peopleI know how you feel. My husband, and my closest friends dont believe me. They all say, everyone suffers from that, or if I just worked harder.. or I do that, that is not ADD. I am sick of it. One of my good friends doesnt even really speak to me anymore. I guess she thinks I'm just rude, insensitive and forgetful, and using this ADD thing as an excuse. I dont know. or maybe I changed?? I am more aware of the kind of people I allow in my life. MMMMMM....
I know how you feel. It is just down right insulting.
Usually when I tell my friends that I have ADD they're like, yeah. you just figured that out?
People don't think it's wierd that they can be diagnosed with other medical conditions after talking to a doctor for only a few minutes. I think 40 minutes is a long time. Usually when you have ADD they can tell after asking you a few questions if they know what they're doing.
Funny you should mention the weight thing - that's a very good example. I worked with a 30-year old woman who used to constantly make fun of our "fat" receptionist. The receptionist did happen to have thyroid problems, and from what I could tell, the woman hardly ate. Yet this other woman used to talk about her behind her back and laugh that she used thyroid trouble as an excuse. "They all have 'thyroid problems'", she would say, rolling her eyes. "You just have to exercise and eat right and you'll never get to be that fat".
I don't have thyroid problems, but I still believe it exists! Some people are just very narrow minded. They are perfectly content to live in their ignorant little worlds, all the while believing they know the answer to everything. It makes me so mad!
I think it is mainly people don't understand most things unless it is clearly visible or they have experienced it themselves. LOL I remember as a kid whenever I saw a fat person thinking how lazy and gross they were. If I saw them eating anything but a salad I'd think keep eating fatass. If I saw them drinking a diet soda I'd think it's gonna take a lot more then diet pepsi to lose those bulges. LOL oddly enough I never made fun of the fat people that were riding bikes or partaking in some other form of exercise.
Ok to my point lol I do have one. Of course some of them were just lazy eating machines but i never accounted for the ones that were fat for medical reasons. I did not believe medication could effect somones weight so drastically until I got sick one year and wound up in the same boat. Let me tell ya this skinny kid was shocked. I was amazed by the difference the meds made. I wasn't really eating more but was so inactive and my metabolism was so slow that I wasn't burning off any of the calories I took in. I could eat salads all day and still gain weight it was a real eye opener.
I don't really tell people I have adhd or any other disorder simply because I don't think it is any of there business. Sure they may find some of my quirks annoying but I can be just as annoyed by their behavoir at times. Anyone who says that their "normal" friends don't have at least one thing they do that drives them mad is either lying or not very observant lol
I don't expect people to understand ADHD the only thing I expect is common courtesy. LOL my firends know how I operate if you point out my flaws expect me to point out yours lol
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[QUOTE=MafiaKiddo]lol that statement would have ended the friendship for me. Of course I end friendships very easily so thats probably not a good option for most people [/QUOTE]
I didn't really mean to suggest that bcgirl actually SAY this to her friend...
I was more or less voicing my disdain at the comment her friend made.
I agree...its painful not to be believed and understood by your loved ones. For me its my husband...he's trying to understand and I believe he will one day especially if he can meet others in his position. The more he meets..the more he'll at least begin to suspect that this isn't a simplistic diagnosis.
But I find it hypocrytical of only some here to say they wish the "normies" to understand but in my poll, will not support or can not understand why a place for them to discuss this very issue here, is even nessisary. No one would dare post here that doesn't have ADHD or are not at least, very understanding of ADHD... unless invited by giving them a space to do just that. Once here...if we treat them with the respect we wish from them....they may begin to understand what we already know.
It would be a huge help in my relationship to have your support and understanding on this matter.
Karen N38475.7326041667 [QUOTE=sonya_h][QUOTE=MafiaKiddo]lol that statement would have ended the friendship for me. Of course I end friendships very easily so thats probably not a good option for most people [/QUOTE]
I didn't really mean to suggest that bcgirl actually SAY this to her friend...
I was more or less voicing my disdain at the comment her friend made.
[/QUOTE]Thats what I was referring to also lol. I know if my friends don't want to accept me as me then I tell them to hit the road. Can always make new friends, I won't change to please others and won't ask others to change for me.
[QUOTE=Karen N]No one would dare post here that doesn't have ADHD or are not at least, very understanding of ADHD... unless invited by giving them a space to do just that. Once here...if we treat them with the respect we wish from them....they may begin to understand what we already know.[/QUOTE]
Think everyone is getting a bit too sensitive so guess we need to drop the subject for awhile. LOL "No one would DARE"
it's an anonymous online forum not exactly scary stuff here. your not worth it
Karen N38476.7634027778I think that adhd is a very difficult thing for those around us to grasp.Your friend probably views you as someone who is easily mislead.I have noticed that I seem to surround myself with people who think they are helping me when in reality I am patiently carrying them.My point is that your friends motives may be pure.If ignorance is truly bliss there would be alote more happy people.