Hi everyone, My 9 year old son is so much like me at his age it is scary. We are both medicated. I take 30 mg Adderall XR with an afternoon boost of 10 mg regular adderall when I remember. He takes 10 mg Adderall XR, 40 mg Strattera and 10 mg Lexapro. I don't want him to grow up and have the same kinds of problems I have had all my life. His bedroom is a disaster. I keep after him to clean it up. To him cleaning is shoving everything in boxes or under the bed or in the closet. He doesn't sort things and put parts and pieces to one toy in one box. everyting is mixed up and so you can never actually play with anything because you can't find all the pieces. I have gotten into a few hyperfocus days where I will dump everything in the middle of the room and make him stay in there with me and put everything away in the right place (OK so maybe I have some obsessive tendencies too). This organization usually only lasts a week. My bedroom was the exact same way when I was a kid with an additional problem of sharing a room with a sister who also has ADHD (undiagnosed). My mother who also had undiagnosed ADHD just let us leave our rooms that way. The only thing I picked up was my dirty clothes so my Mom would wash them. Usually when I butt heads with my son he gets his stubborn face (I have the same stubborn face) on and then I know we are going to get nowhere. This also applies when he has been reprimanded or punished for something. Instead of trying to fix the problem or respond appropriately he tries to turn it around as my fault. He also gets these times when he is really hard on himself but instead of trying to learn from his mistakes he just shuts down.
UPDATE: I have overcome some of my messiness by having one room I can dump all my unsorted stuff in until I get a day I can spend sorting and putting away. My son doesn't have the luxury of having a separate place to put all his messes so I don't see them. He doesn't even put his dirty clothes down the laundry shoot without having to be prompted several times and it is right outside his bedroom door. He walks by it many times a day. I do have a problem with chaos now that I obviously didn't have as a kid. It is really hard to have such a hard time getting motivated (procrastinating) on getting things done when I hate to have a messy dirty house. Sometimes my clean freak side wins out sometimes my ADHD tendencies do.
Do I just need to lighten up and give him a break?
Sorry about that (blah, blah, blah). Those of you who stuck with me, what I am trying to get at is this, do any of you have suggestion on what to try with him. Did your parents have techniques that worked with you? Have you learned some kind of coping techniques on your own? Any suggestion would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks in Advance. -Gettingagrip-
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