Trouble listening
Guess the Mountain Dew isn't working, huh? 
Sorry, I don't have any suggestions.
Would providing incentives or consequences help? I don't know what things she likes to do but maybe if you gave her a list of stuff that needs to be done the ball is in her court. If it does not get done then she does not get tv, or video games, or phone time, or whatever. She has to suffer the consequences and it takes you out of the role of having to look over her shoulder. Hard to say what would incent her w/o knowing her.... just a suggestion!We are doing this. She is on the marble system. She earns privledges with it like tv, computer, and dessert. She just isn't following through with the instructions we are giving her. Like I said, it is taking standing over her to get her to do what we want. It is probably the worst it has ever been. She was doing so well up until this week. Things she would do very well before, she now does half a**ed. She just doesn't care. I don't know how to get through to her.
MegMaguire:
Yes, she has a chart of all the things she is supposed to do. The things she isn't doing are simple one-step requests like "go pick up the clothes on your bathroom floor". She came down and said she did it. When I checked and saw that she hadn't, I asked her why. She told me she didn't know where they went. She does know, but I told her she should have asked me.
tisacson:
I think you may have hit the nail on the head. I have noticed in the past that when she gets into major trouble, she kind of gives up trying. It is just bizarre to me. When I was a kid, if I got into trouble, I really stepped up my effort to stay out of trouble. She does the opposite. I'm not sure how to motivate her to do better.
sheri.m:
She does really well with me. I have been in her life since she was 2, so for 5 years now. She has never felt the "you can't tell me what to do" thing. Honestly, I think she listenes to me the most out of all her parents. I'm the one always saying that she need to listen to her mom, dad, and step-dad.
Well, my son has decided not to wash his hair or brush his teeth or pick up after himself or call when he gets to a friend's house. You know, all those rules he's been following for YEARS! I feel like we are regressing. Do you think this is the summer break phenomenon? He's driving me crazy
.[QUOTE=stepmom2maddy]She earns privledges with it like tv, computer, and dessert....... I don't know how to get through to her.[/QUOTE]
I'd give it some time for these lost privledges to "sink in" -- or, find others that matter more to her! Sounds like an adjustment is in order to straighten her out!
Also, I have found w/ my husband (who is ADHD) that giving him a written list helps a lot. He cannot really remember verbal instructions -- he needs the structure of a list. He also likes to check the items off when he gets finished with them.
she may just be having an "off-week" too. Everyone deals with drama differently. It sounds like he sneakign out incident caused a lot of drama. Maybe she is just still coping with it. I'd give her a little tiem before I made any huge adjustments in any reward system that she is used to. She may just need some consistency and support right now.she may be just going thru that stage of her life.. how old is she.. once they hit teenage yrs look out. i know my daughter dosn't think she has to listen to anyone.she also has a really hard time listening to her step parents. she says their not my parents.i have told her that when she is at her dads she has to listen to her step monster(mom) just joking and when she is at home she has to listen to her step d**k(dad).
[QUOTE=stepmom2maddy]We are doing this. She is on the marble system. She earns privledges with it like tv, computer, and dessert. She just isn't following through with the instructions we are giving her. Like I said, it is taking standing over her to get her to do what we want. It is probably the worst it has ever been. She was doing so well up until this week. Things she would do very well before, she now does half a**ed. She just doesn't care. I don't know how to get through to her. [/QUOTE]
DONT LAUGH BUT WHAT IS THE MARBLE SYSTEM... MAYBE THIS IS SOMETHING I NEED TO TRY..... HA HA I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT IT IS......... I AM A DORK SORRY
That's the word Regressing, i could not think of that for the life of me. That's the way i feel like my son is regressing. Why? It's like he's not thinking straight about anything. He knows better but the actions he takes are mind boggling. I don't know what he's thinking--or if he is at all.My SD has not been listening whatsoever this week. If I tell her to do something, she does the complete opposite. Or she will move toward the general direction of what you want her to do, but not do it. Or she will kind of do it, but put as little effort into it as she can.
I have been tryng so hard to be patient, but it is becoming increaingly frustrating. I will have her repeat back to me exactly what I want--but no luck. I break each task down into smaller, simpler directions--but no luck. She even has this on her chart to earn marbles--but no luck. The only thing that works is if I stand over her and dictate what she needs to do.
She was doing so well last week with listening and trying, but this week has been a complete bust. Does anyone have any good suggestions on how to remedy this?
Enter Your Email below to claim your Free Book