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Your parent’s perceptions of ADHDMy dad just said,"well you didn't get it from me." ( Mr. Hiper himself). And my mom thinks EVERYTHING can be fixed with vitimins, that it has to be a dificiency of some kind. I tried to educate my parents on it, and my Mom still said, "well what exactly causes it?" Rei! you mean to say that you may not have been a procrastinating, day dreaming, caffeine addicted, hyperactive fetus? Your infant life was not dotted with incomplete tasks, missing wallets !? And yet you want to wear the ADHD crown? Shame shame! Claiming adhd without that essential history will discredit us all! My family doesn;t know anything about ADHD. My high school principal used to send them books about ADHD, so that they could learn. The only person who read the books was me, even though they were geared toward parents. They took me to the psychiatrist to get the diagnosis, at the request of the school- actually, I was going to be kicked out if I did not see a psychiatrist. I came home with meds, and the same kind of inconclusive diagnosis that everybody gets...It looks like add- wanna take blue pills or pink? I chose the blue- the adderall. Lost the bottle a day or two later. We never had it refilled, and ADHD was never researched or discussed again. Recently, I went to a doctor for a prescription, some years after the initial diagnosis, because many things in life- I mess up because of ADHD symptoms. I thought Adderall could help...I would give it a chance. My family has no idea that I went, and I would not consider telling them. If they were not interested then, why now. My mom and stepdad know and they don't have any issues with me being on medication for it. As a matter of fact, they have told me that they can tell a big difference when I've taken my medication. My dad and stepmom don't know about it yet, and I'm not sure that I'm going to tell them. My in-laws all know about it and don't have issues with it either. Thanks everyone, knowing that other people experience similar frustrations makes me feel better. I usually don't tell people about my ADHD because I'm afraid they'll think I'm just using it as an excuse. Supporting and understanding people are hard to come by sometimes . . . My parents were GREAT about my ADHD! I sat them down and told them all about what I've learned and what I'm doing to get better. They were so happy that it wasn't bad parenting or that they did something wrong. I am severe ADHD and caused them no end of grief from age 6 or 7 to when I left home. Even after they have sat up many nights worrying about their boy. I'm 38 now and I have a far better relationship with my parents now that I've worked out the kinks in my meds/therapy and have apologized to them for the grief my disorder caused their life as I grew up. Now we are like adults who like each other, and have gained new respect for one another too. I can now bring up good memories I have that I never remembered before. It's just so awesome to have the whole picture and to share it all with them. My experience is men are the ones that have harder times with this diagnose more than women. My family also has been great about it, especially my mother. It just answered so many questions about why I am the way that I am, both good and bad. My Aunt was afraid if I got on meds I wouldn't be their crazy and creative family member anymore! Anyway, I felt alot of relief when I figured out what was going on, and I think so did they. Now however I'm going through the OK what do I do with it now phase!Well, I'm pretty sure that at least my dad has it, too,and he kind of agrees but prefers to call it "entrepaneurship" and refer to, well, all the positive sides of it. Marching to a different drummer, kids who don't fit in because they learn differently and won't conform, etc. - that was his first response, but he and my mom were also supportive. I don't think my mom in particular understands what it means on the day to day for me, but I've sent them some info. Since I was getting the "full battery of tests" sponsored through my university (LD/ADHD educational assessment), there was a big parent section for them to fill out, so I asked them the questions over the phone - hence they were quite involved from nearly the start. My mom describes me as "sproingy." I thought there would be an issue with me taking meds, but no. That was surprising, because they are very anti-drug. I guess if I thought they would be a little bit opposed or, more specifically, shocked, I'd still have told/involved them for sure, but much later as much as I could. I like to say stuff to shock them in phone conversations... But if they were totally unsupportive, "this doesn't exist" etc, I'd feel really crappy. I have a few friends I feel weird talking to about it (one girl I think "collects" ADHD people, and thinks she knows a lot about "us," but really doesn't, that's annoying). I think my (recent ex)boyfriend thinks the diagnosis and in particular the medication is unneccesary (and possibly this was part of our current break/breakup) but we are alternatively excellent OR totally awful at communication, and this is a totally awful period, so I don't know yet. Yep. My wife kept saying I have ADHD and I denied for many years. We have came close to divorce many times but then I caved in and saw a psy. I am now 35. Strattera is working a bit but I will ask for more effective method. She and the kids are much happier after noticing my small improvements.. Still a lot to go.. In Laws are glad about it. My mother doesnt seem to accept it. She likes thinking ALL problems are my wife's fault.. Not true.What do your parents think about your ADHD, especially if you were diagnosed as an adult? Are they supportive or do they refuse to acknowledge that ADHD is a valid condition? Have you even told them about it? I’m curious about how other people’s parents view their ADHD. My parents are Christian Scientists (they pray instead of using medicine), and every time that I bring up the topic of ADHD, they go into a lecture about how ADHD isn’t real and doctors are just drugging up kids to make it easier for the teachers. (of course, they don‘t believe in schizophrenia or diabetes either, so at least they‘re consistent I haven’t told them that I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD and am on medication (I‘m 19 and still live with my parents). I don’t know if I will tell them - my Mom would understand that I am doing what I think is best for me, even though she doesn’t agree with it, but I’m not sure about my Dad. He always says things like “Stop acting like that! It makes us think we didn‘t raise you right.” or when I tell him I‘m trying really hard to pay attention when people talk, he says “Don‘t try, just do.” My parents aren’t bad people or anything, but sometimes I feel frustrated that I can’t talk to them about my ADHD. But, I suppose that’s what I came here for . . . My dad doesn't know. I still have yet to get my official diagnosis. And what REALLY stews me is my first husband read the list of symptoms I sent him and he claims I am nothing like that and have no ADHD. Hmm..I have lived with myself 34 years I know from years 33+ what I was like. Anything younger than age 1 and I can't think back any farther. hehI would never ever tell my parents.I don't tell ANYONE. I don't speak to my dad and haven't in years.... My mom thinks it's cool that I'm "outgoing and speak my mind", "rebellious to the rules of society (don't take s**t if I feel the cause is worth standing up for), independent and totally in no need of a man in my life (ok, mom...i've been thru 82 "serious" relationships in the past, um, 20 years....don't you think I should seek some sort of inner understanding counseling???)....All jokes aside, I have a wonderful boyfriend who was recently diagnosed with ADD and I am proof positive that I have AD/HD. I feel though, that my mom would "blow it off" as me being a "stubborn, bullheaded kid from the get go"...and as for my boyfriends' parents...they are Jahovah's Witnesses and refuse to believe he has anything wrong other than the fact that he "just doesn't listen", "is immature", and "can not handle his finances"....."It's a male disorder"....they say. Okey Dokey then..... I'm 21 and I live with my mom and there are times she is understandable of my ADD/ADHD because she works with children who are mentally handicapped and severlely psychotic etc. and then there are times she uses the line "You're choosing to act that way." As for my dad, as a kid he didn't care for my theraphy or ADD/ADHD, but now was an adult, he is trying to be a little more understanding. Some of the time. My mom is also very religous. But,meh. ^__^I have been talking with my mom and husband about it for awhile. I always bring up reasons why I thought I had it. My husband would say oh and go onto something else and my mom would say yeah that sounds like you. But now that I am on meds for it my husband is like wow its really helping you and my mom is like Your losing to much weight and totally acts like I am just taking a weight loss pill. I have tried to explain to her how my thinking is so much clear but I can tell it is going into one ear and out the other. It is very frustrating. I don't want anybody to know I have adult add. These two people are the only ones that know. Its to bad people just don't understand unless they have been in our shoes. http://www.adhdnews.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=9309&P N=1 there ya go I fortunately have parents that I'm close to and have been great about my ADHD. My dad who is Bi-Polar was elated and said "At least you didn't get the Bi-Polar curse". My mom just went on and on about how if she would have known when I was a kid she would have helped me and how sorry she was that she didn't notice anything. My dad and I see the same psychiatrist (I went to her on his recommendation) and he's concerned about my meds, side effects, etc. My husband is great with everything and I swear he should be made a saint for marrying a basketcase like me! LOL I'd never tell my in-laws. I can see my MIL telling all of her friends at the Ladies' Town Club about her "whacko daughter in law" and how she "knew that she had mental problems". |
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