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Annia38590.5746875Thanks for the encouragement, Fallen! Those are some pretty amazing achievements! I hope you’re right ...Delete 
Fallen,
You implied that its only straight thinkers who think about the box. I talk about thinking outside of the box all the time and I have ADD. Its the straight thinkers who I see as being enclosed in a box, with their inability to see everything about a situation that we see. For me, one road leads to 40 others while for them, they only see two roads.
Its great to hear your success story! Very encouraging!
Anna,I flunked computer science at high school level. Why? because they wanted me to learn about point-of-sale terminals and do basic dataprocessing in BASIC.
All my reports said: "doesnt meet his potential, needs to be more self disciplined and apply more effort".
I barely graduated high school with average grades - kinda bad when you consider I was streamed in the advanced classes.
I've attempted college 4 times, I've dropped out before the end of the first semester 4 times.
At 23 I started playing with a Mac, at 24 I started my first job - plugging computers in for GTE/BBN staff. At 33 I manage one of the busiest networks on the internet (Cisco support crew have their jaws drop when they see the traffic numbers). I've been mentioned in Wired magazine, helped the FBI and Secret Service resolve a high profile criminal hacking case(s), and am considered one of the best in my field.
My point? it may not feel like it but college is just a small part of the rest of who you'll become. With your ADD you'll be able to work creatively and find ways forward that your less gifted peers would never consider possible.
Follow what you love, use your gifts (both ADD and natural) to push yourself forward. Enjoy college - I really wish I could have stuck it out, but it certainly hasn't proved to be a handicap in any way shape or form - except to lock me out of the kinds of jobs that would cause me to die a horrible death of boredom (government and large corp jobs that look at bits of paper rather than raw skill).
You'll hear people talk about a box and thinking outside of it. That's what people who think inside boxes think like, even thinking 'outside of it' they're aware of a box. Your ADD can help you understand that there is no box. Forget about the 'right way' to do things and develop 'your way' of doing things, no matter how crazy it may seem or the odd looks you'll get from the people around you.
For instance, when I'm trying to solve a tricky problem I'll play video games, have the TV playing extreme skydiving videos, have my stereo on playing something loud and obnoxious. I'll switch between playing the game and picking up my guitar and watching the videos. After a couple of hours the solution will spring fully formed in my head with no concious effort. Buddhists practice for years to gain that skill, for me its a natural part of how my brain works.
So no, I'm not saying quit college, I'm saying experiment and find a way to make it work for you, even if your ideas seem crazy at first they can often be the most effective way for an ADD person to function in the real world.
I'm also saying that even if you find that college is not for you there are many other ways to end up where you'd like to be. In general us ADD types tend to be better at non-traditional methods of advancement.
Hi Annia
The testing is not so hard....I didn't like the Math part....But other than that I found it interesting.
The commints you have on report cards, make me think if you have ADD it would be the inattentive type.
Good luck!
Sorry gotta delete these posts ... it's waaaaay too obvious who I am! 
Annia38590.5715740741
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It sounds like ADD-Inattentive to me. I am primarily inattentive but get fidgity a lot. You will know when the eval is finished.
As for your parents, unless you think they won't understand, you could just tell them you were evaluated and what the results are and end it with, "Now maybe I can get the grades I know I am capable of and not waste any more money on classes I couldn't pass before" or something like that. I would definitely figure out a way to give them the information as a positive thing rather than a negative. It explains the past and gives new hope for the future.
I'm glad you are finally getting some answers. Not knowing what is wrong but knowing something is, is frightening. Everyone here who was not diagnosed as a child knows that feeling. Welcome!
"my mom would often do some of my homework for me."
My dad would ALWAYS end up typing up my assignments in high school and junior high! (well, often) - I don't recall if i wrote them in the weeks or HOURS before this, but it was always the night before it was due when it got typed and printed (actually pretty embarrasing, because starting in grade 7, I would be pretty protective of stuff I wrote, not wanting to show anyone, until I started writing plays and making comic books in grade 11).
"With the way my life is right now, I could start studying for a test two or three weeks ahead of time and still be on the first chapter the day before the test."
This is definitely what I have done, and only in the last few months (post-diagnosis, on meds, getting help from the school re: learning strategies, lots of work myself, especially re: my excessive temper tantrums) have I started to prepare - get this! it's amazing! - even a week before and actually get the studying DONE!!!
The most important thing has been my focus on learning strategies, and I've got a couple of great people helping with this. They both firmly believe that there are NO set-in-stone ways to learn (if it works to cram for some subjects, do it; and my new favourite for kinesthetic learners: just scribble as though you were writing while THINKING the stuff you need to memorise, learn, etc. - you can write key words in full, but just the action of pencil-to-paper while thinking or speaking the stuff keys it in so I remember it - my learning strategist has tried this herself and is going to suggest it to people now!).
The other really important thing that has also been VERY hard is to forgive myself when I do screw up, etc. "procrastinate LESS" is a good sum-up of this idea - even just thinking about what you want to do and know that it takes time to learn new habits, and then recognising when you do get it... and not being disapointed with yourself (with the action, sure) if you "don't" get it. (and when I try to do more than one or maybe two if they are small, it doesn't work. The first one was the tantrums thing)
I also used to fall asleep in lectures!!! I always had to be eating something or else I would sleep. Worst were mid-afternoon ones, which is predictable, but all of them, especially on the rare times when I actually got to the class within 30 minutes of it starting.
I was also afraid to tell my parents, thinking they would say "no that's not true, it doesn't exist" but the worst they said was (from my dad) that there are a lot of kids who just don't learn well in our style of school and they should get the chance to do it differently. But even that was in a supportive way, I think he sent me some "positive side of ADHD" links as well!
They were actually involved in the evaluation, the history part, and I talked to them over the phone to get the parents, history sections done. The hardest part was finding out I was supposed to have been skipped ahead in grade 3, but they decided I wasn't mature enough to handle it... GRR!
Anyway I'll write more later but I should actually do some work now.
Hi
Yes, I think mine were inconsistent. I don't recall much of what they said, and my parents couldn't find them when I was going for my evaluation/diagnosis.
I got sent to the office all the time in kindergarten through grade one (there was always candy there!) and after that I guess I got more careful and also withdrew from most of the kids in my own grade, well the "popular" (aka boring) ones. In class, we were (of course) expected to sit in our seats etc. more by grade 2 and 3 and I actually remember not learning a few units (one on Roman numerals) just because I didn't feel like it.
But I didn't get in trouble during class anymore - I probably looked like i was paying attention, writing notes off the bored or whatever, but I was instead just constantly drawing in my books! There were big windows in the classrooms as well.
I hyperfocus on tests and I must have picked up enough in class through listening or maybe the tone of voice of the teachers made me key in enough because I usually got decent marks.
I remember running around a lot in recess but hating gym - all those rules and kids my age! ick! (I was on xcountry running and skiing which were both sports where you pretty much just get to GO! and be on your own...)
I've recently learned I'm a kinesthetic learner, so the drawing probably helped key in the stuff I was hearing and presumably processing.
Oh, and i also was diagnosed only after my third year (well, in the 2nd half of it) of university! Exciting! I left school for 2 years and have just returned this summer session. I've got a coach and a learning strategist for free through the school, so if you can get access to help like that go for it, although if you are like me you will get frustrated after about 2 weeks of working on "ADHD stuff" - if you can stick with it longer than that while getting help from someone, it's worth it, but I also reccommend taking a break, maybe travelling...
good luck and have fun!
[QUOTE=Annia]Anyway, is there anyone around here whose report cards don't paint a clear picture of ADD?[/QUOTE]"Little Resistance is brilliant, but does not apply himself"
sums me up.
made bad grades too.
talked incessantly before, during and after class.
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When I was around ten years old, I saw a program about Schizophrenia on TV and completely freaked out. I was afraid that I would become schizophrenic if I didn't stop daydreaming as much as I did ... so I always kind of knew I was different from everyone else ... I was just too afraid to tell anyone (I thought it sounded pretty crazy!).
[/QUOTE]
LOL, Annia! I distinctly remember a period of time around 4th grade when I though I was mentally retarded. I mean....seriously, mentally retarded. Later on I was convinced I was mentally ill....schizophrenic or something...so I made a point to read as much as I could about mental illness, treatment, and novels about young people in mental institutions. I was preparing myself for the day.....
Years later I learned my IQ is well above average, and although I don't see the world the way 'normals' do, I'm not certifiable (yet), and if luck holds, may never need to be institutionalized.
p.s. Not unless I want to. Fortunately it takes a lot for someone to be 'put away' in the nut house, unlike 35 years ago!
Annia-
-I am new here, 37 pharmacy tech, married to a pharmacist, listen I was 36 when I was diagnosed, Only YOU know how you really feel, If you try one med and you dont feel its working speak up. I was always complimented on my memory, in the workforce, I started menopause and look out, it was like living in a fog, like turning a tv show on then off , then on, trying to make sense of stuff.
I have always been hyper and perky, my doctor of 21 years had me fill out a adhd questionaire, it was national adhd week, and yep, guess who almost fell of the table? He told me sometimes menopause can cause adhd, and I looked it up , yep! Adderall, made me moody and bitchy. Ritalin works great, with celexa, because when ritalin wears off it can cause dips in emotions, this way I am the happy camper. I tried strattera, adderall xr, plain adderall, just celexa which i liked but felt dizzy and off balance. I didnt see a psychiatrist, try your regualr md
sometimes psychiatrists are always looking for comorbidity, and thats not always the case, so remember you know whats working for you and if he wont listen, bye bye doc, get a second opinion.
-just a thought
jasmund
Oh long emails in the morning...
I would take 3 hour breaks pre-med (or on my non med days), not on purpose, it would always just end up being 3 hours, no matter what I was doing (school, cleaning room etc). So instead of doing the reccommended "work in small periods of time, etc" which would mean work 40 minutes space out/run around for 3 hours, I would work for 3-5 hours straight. The only break I would maybe be able to take quickly was a pee break, so I (still) always would drink water or cranberry juice (along with the coffee, when coffee wasn't putting me to sleep), and therefore I wouldn't atrophy my legs (if I was sitting, studying). This would either result in my hyperfocussing being activated, maybe by setting up an "anchor" in that way of doing stuff, or in doing the work for the long time but also totally getting distracted (cleaning my room: hyperfocus on organising my socks, ie., then literally throw the rest of my clothes in the drawers - still do this!)
He said he chooses by “taking the SMART ONES … the ones with a 4.0 GPA”. Those were his exact words, and they’ve stayed with me ever since. Every time I look at my transcript, that is what I think about "
Absolutely!!! I hate that and that attitude, and the emphasis on marks, especially after getting good grades in high school with what felt like no effort.. I am working on not caring about it and my art prof last semester has been super helpful about this, because after the first exam, taking it up, she explained about the distribution of grades in the class (a 1st year class, btw):
A and A+ will probably stay at that level;
A- and B+ might raise a bit or drop a bit;
C+ and B- and B are the students who will do brilliantly in grad school because their ideas are way too big for undergrad!
Below that will improve for sure if you come to class more, see the prof in office hours, come to a study session, etc.
Really positive, and she said her grades were in the C+ to B range... Funny story was that one of her classmades in undergrad never went to this one class, borrowed her notes, and got A and A+ in the assignments, while she always got B's. The guy who borrowed the notes said he just looked for what the prof was emphasising throughout and focussed more on that. If only I could ever figure that out, consistently!
Though, pre-awareness of having ADHD, I always tried to get to go to office hours etc. and I literally always forgot! Then I would feel it was too late in the course, they would already have decided I was dumb, etc.
I fell asleep in my music class this summer!!! The whole 1st half I was dropping in and out, I was even eating the whole time but I would notice my notes were all... scrawly and on one line... and missing.. and then POW! He played Haydn's "Surprise Symphony" and I was totally awake the rest of the class. Funny. I want an alarm clock with that song on it!
It's entirely about baby steps and I'm in a good mood about it lately because I've got a relatively easy work and courseload at the moment. Last semester i was bogged down with 3 art shows and fulltime summer classes, and it seemed that any time I was making a real effort, I would end up getting a worse result than normal... Not to be discouraging, I'm mentioning that to say that it will improve but not at all quickly on some things. I need to find an internal motivation for everything. This is hard when it comes to cleaning the mold from under the bathroom sink... or reading more than 5 pages in a row. Ack! It's so hard to explain this!!! I'm sure you understand.
As for waiting to tell your parents, if you wait, try waiting only until the next "mental health week" or whatever if there is one where you/they live. Then you have a seguay if you feel uncomfortable. But if you try to improve your life before telling them, you'll be potentially losing a great support. If they aren't supportive they would just be confused when you seem extra frustrated as you are slowly making changes. I had a roommate who was like this to me, confused about how slow it was going with the tantrums (which annoyed her no end), but at least she knew what was going on and could be decent about it sometimes. Another roommate was actually very supportive and would just walk away when I was having a "time out"..
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Annia38590.5750694444[QUOTE=jasmund]Annia-
-I am new here, 37 pharmacy tech, married to a pharmacist, listen I was 36 when I was diagnosed, Only YOU know how you really feel, If you try one med and you dont feel its working speak up. I was always complimented on my memory, in the workforce, I started menopause and look out, it was like living in a fog, like turning a tv show on then off , then on, trying to make sense of stuff.
I have always been hyper and perky, my doctor of 21 years had me fill out a adhd questionaire, it was national adhd week, and yep, guess who almost fell of the table? He told me sometimes menopause can cause adhd, and I looked it up , yep! Adderall, made me moody and bitchy. Ritalin works great, with celexa, because when ritalin wears off it can cause dips in emotions, this way I am the happy camper. I tried strattera, adderall xr, plain adderall, just celexa which i liked but felt dizzy and off balance. I didnt see a psychiatrist, try your regualr md
sometimes psychiatrists are always looking for comorbidity, and thats not always the case, so remember you know whats working for you and if he wont listen, bye bye doc, get a second opinion.
-just a thought
jasmund[/QUOTE]
Thanks Jasmund! I'll keep that in mind. 
The getting stuff done great under pressure thing is great once you understand that it's okay if that's what works. I really want to use it to write essays for example a week even before it's due, all in one night, and then edit it the night before it's due. Because the "slow and steady" thing drives me NUTS!!! I hate writing outlines, for example, because, well, once the outline is done the essay seems done...
"Most of the profs that I have spoken with say that you need at least a B+ to A- to get into grad . so those people with C- and B-, no matter how brilliant, may not even get the chance to show what they're really made of. Of course, there are always exceptions but this is generally how it is. Competition is fierce these days."
What program would you be going for? I've been deciding to go on into Architecture, and numerous people (architecture students, architects, profs) have said that there can be a huge component for experience, as long as you have a relevant degree and I think the lowest grade was B-, but it might have been B+. Anything where you need a portfolio is a chance to show what you can do. I'll ask the prof from that art class what she did. I think maybe people improve their grades only in the final year. Maybe that's when all those brilliant B- students (i.e. us) get dx with ADHD (or some other 'invisible disability') and finally get the help we need if we haven't dropped out yet!
"I find summer to be a bit more manageable than the regular school year .. I guess it's the difference in course load (2 courses during the summer vs. five during the year). Thus far, I haven't been able to get through five courses successfully. I'm registered for five again this coming school year. I'm not sure how I'm going to cope though . I'm starting to wonder if I should even attempt such a feat. Are you going for a full course load during the school year, or are you giving yourself some time to get things back on track?"
What are the classes you're taking? I took 1.5 credits/courses - 2 classes in first summer semester and 1 this semester, they were Art History and Music History (art continues this half). All first year credits. And I felt like I was doing really badly, although it's not turning out that way, finally!!! Does your school have a disability centre? Mine is immensely helpful. If you get exam accomodations, think about requesting a room with natural light - I got this by accident for an in class exam, and it was great! no flickering of fluorescents, and the window overlooked a very still, vacant field (i.e. no distractions).
I like trying to "overload" the first half then having one or two fewer courses for the second semester, which only works if you can take 1/2 year courses, which I couldn't for the first 3 years. I've done it for summer courses, and it's great not have to worry about that second class come July.
But even if I were doing full time, I'd like it better. I throw myself the same amount into whatever I do, so 5 courses at once or 2 = the same amount of effort, just split different amounts. EVERYONE I've talked to likes summer courses better for the same reasons as I do - fewer different subjects (divides focus), more intense, better weather (reading under a tree - or just daydreaming... )
Ick 5 courses. Yeah, I'm taking either 4 or 5 depending on if I am to pick up an art history minor or not (finding that out, late, this week - 5 if I do get the minor). I took two years off, travelled.
If you have the time available, try taking 3.5 courses. I'm in Ontario, Canada, so to be considered "full time" you normally need at least 4 courses, unless you have a disability, LD, or ADHD, then it's 2 courses minimum. If you can reduce the courseload AND get help to work on your ADHD, that would probably be the most enjoyable and most personally productive. Then take summer school again.
That's what I intended to do each year after 1st year (before I even suspected WHY it would be a good thing), but (impulsively?) always signed up for full time studies... also my program claims that you can't be part time, but it's really a lie. You can't be part time unless you actually do just go part time... Although I'm taking the full time because I just want to finish it - otherwise I'm likely to jump on a sailing vessel again and NEVER finish!!!!
Re: telling parents or not - if you can make any changes you need and not feel you are letting them down, (even if you need 10 years to do it... or 3, or six months, etc.) that would be my concern. I told them also in part because of a need for attention/to shock them, but they turned out to be supportive. If you have enough support without telling them, or their expectations would be more if you did, that's what I was thinking about (we computer friends might be helpful; so would a university disability services centre).
(no apologies for a long post!!!! acknowledgement of it, though. hee)