Bizarre sense of humor.
I have a cousin who laughs when something is extremely stressful to her. It isn't so much that she finds it funny as that she is unable to handle the stress in a more appropriate manner. The more frightening an experience is for her, the more hysterical her laughter gets. If it is really scary, she passes out.
It used to tick me off when we would be playing and I would get hurt because she would nearly double up with laughter. I thought she thought it was funny that I was hurt but it was just the opposite.
Sometimes I will giggle when I am nervous and sometimes I will cry when I am scared. It is our system's way of dealing with stress when we can't react to the adrenalin rush by running or getting very active. That is my theory anyway. Its sort of a"fight, flight, laugh or cry" situation. Its better than punching someone out! I bet you didn't really think it was funny even when you were laughing. It was your subconscious way of trying to put some emotional distance between you and the horror you were seeing.
Just call me the amateur shrink!
I always analyze everything to death and then some!
Being numb to your feelings is a symptom of severe depression. If you have been that way since 9/11, it is either ongoing or possibly BiPolar in the depressive phase. Talk to your dr about it and if he has been treating you with no change, go to another one. That is why I went on wellbutrin and it felt so good to feel the love and not to just know that I loved my family. I didn't realize just how bad it had gotten until it had gone on for who knows how long. You sound like me before wellbutrin.Thanks for the advice, Barb, but I'm already taking 450 mg of wellbutrin (the maximum dose). I'm also taking
75 mg of anafranil and I was taking 45 mg of paxil. All together that should have been enough antidepressants to make a horse happy.
I don't think I'm BP because there is no mania. I convinced my Dr that I have severe depression the first time I saw him. I think he's doing everything that can be done. (except for shock treatment or lobotomy and I really don't want to go there.)
I think that doing without treatment for 5 years must have roasted my synapses or something. I can still laugh so at least I'm not a total zombie.
I really apreciate your concern and if you have any other suggestions I'd love to hear them.
Chaos,
As I was reading, I beleived that you had some type of depression as well. However, I was suprised to learn as I continued that you were already on Wellbutrin and Paxil.
It may very well be that you don't have a chemical imbalance at all, or haven't found the right medication for you. Have you tried talk? You know with a therapist? It's nice to be able to sit down and just talk about "YOU". It can really help you get things out, if there is indeed something to get out. It kind of reminds me of the County/Western song. "I wanna talk about me". Try talking it out. I'd bet you can find plenty to say. What bothers you. What angers you. What has hurt you. What makes you happy. Your childhood...fatherhood. There's plenty to say...
I don't quite relate to the laughter much. But I do snicker and giggle in conversations out of nervousness. I can related to CheifB when he mentions the roller coster of emotions he felt after 9/11. I often get too emotionally involved with news stories nowadays to a point where my wife won't let me watch the news when she's in the room. 
It may very well be that the feelings you had after 9/11, were just too much to confront.
-JA
Barb,
DAMN, you're good!!
I honestly don't why I laughed. On 9/11 I felt nothing. I wasn't mad at the people who were responsible. I didn't didn't feel sorry for the victims. I certainly didn't feel any joy because of all the death and destruction. And to be perfectly honest I still don't feel anything about the victims - it's like they never existed.I do sympathise with the families of the victims because I saw the grief on their faces afterward. I guess that's an indication of how badly my emotions are screwed up - I'm numb to just about everything.
Thank you for responding to my post. I thought I was so far gone that not even the ADD crowd would be able to relate to me - that's a scary thought. Most of you seem to have a spouse or friends or family. All I have is my daughter and it's not fair to depend on your kids for emotional support. Do any of you folks laugh at times or subjects that are completely inappropriate? For example: I watched most of the events of 9/11 on live tv. When the second tower collapsed I laughed out loud.
It bothers me that I found something funny in the deaths of thousands of people. (I'm not in the habit of laughing at the misfortune of others and if any of you lost loved ones on 9/11 you have my deepest sympathies.) But I wonder if the ability to see humor in almost any situation has helped me survive. I can even laugh at my own situation. I supposedly have a near-genius level IQ but I labored for 10 years in dirt factory - if that isn't funny, nothing is.
My son laughs at odd things that he sees on television. Everyone just looks at him as if he is some kind of crazy person when he does.
I read in "Scattered" that the ADDer tends to be hypersensitive to the plight of others. I know, for example, that I am deeply affected by what I saw that morning as I stood in my living room. My emotions surrounding this event run from painfully sympathetic to hatred and back again. I absolutely cannot seem to get past the anger I feel toward those who arranged those murders and those who condoned them. It has been nearly three years if that gives you some notion as to what I mean when I say that I am hypersensitive.
Do you suppose that you and my son use laughter as a means of protecting yourselves from emotional overload?
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