My son is rough with our cat. He's learned to move very quickly when the cat's had enough. That's not what you want to hear, I'm sure.
This is going to sound bizarre, and maybe I'm making connections that aren't there, but my son has made progress since he's started playing with Webkinz. For some reason the computerized animals ,which he can't hurt and don't leave him when he does something wrong to them, has made some sort of connection with him. He makes sure to take care of them - feeding them, grooming them, putting them to bed. And it seems to have rubbed off on how he treats his real cat; he's definitely more gentle. Who knows, maybe he just grew up a little. Maybe I'm just trying to justify the time and expense of his online habit. But I think he's had focused practice on how to treat animals in a safe environment and it's helped him.
farm mom.
How is she with other children? My ADD daughter just had to give up her untreated ADHD friend. She once was taking medication but her mother felt that she "outgrew" her ADHD. The girl hurts my dd every time they try to play such as impulsively plopping down on her head (she's overweight) or hitting her in the face with a seat belt buckle. I've let her mother know about the incidents in a kind way because I know it is just impulsiveness. I won't force my dd to play with her because it is to painful! I just wish the mom would medicate her so that the girls could have a normal relationship but it is not my place to suggest it. The best I can do is tell her what is happening. This girl now has no friends and adults don't like her either.
Sorry for being so blunt.
Thank you so so much. You are absolutely correct. I needed to hear this.PATIENCE, PATIENCE, PATIENCE
That is my biggest advice. It is SO hard for these kids to "get it". Controlling impulsiveness is really hard for them. It took us a VERY long time to get our kids (one ADHD one not, but young) to not be rough with our animals. Our youngest (6) has learned, but can STILL get too rough. I wouldnt even let her near a chick. We had chicks before she was born. I would keep her away as much as possible. When she is with them, have it supervised. OVERLY praise her when she's gentle and appropriate. If she's not, she must leave. It's going to be hard on you having to supervise this way, but it's really the only way. When my 6 year old was a toddler and constantly bothering the dogs, if she didnt stop she had to go to her room until she felt she could. Othersie I kept them separated.
Hi
I am new here and the adoptive mom of 3 siblings who all have ADHD and are being successfully treated with Concerta. All had a history of aggression and school problems. The children are 6, 8, and 9, literally a year apart and are bio sibs.
I am an animal lover and we have a farm with horses, goats, chicks, dogs and cats. My daughter who just turned 8 is every bit the animal lover I am. However she has a history of being too rough with pets. She does not seem to learn from the ad nauseum pre-teaching I have done with her since she was a baby. She recently killed her brothers chick by squeezing it when it tried to get away. I honestly think it was an accident and she was very devestated. We did not shame her, and hsile spoke firmly and spent a great deal of time processing what she did.
Since that time 2 weeks ago, I continue to catch her teasing the pets, not letting them go, scaring them and even hitting them.
She is not abused, stressed or having any problems in any other areas. She is an A student and loved by her teachers and peers. She is a wonderful child, except for this sneaky relentless behavior with our animals.
Getting rid of the animals is not an option.
I am one tired and frustrated mom. These kids were so very challenging for the first 6 years with us, but now that they are all diagnosed and on the proper dosages things are going so so well.
The ironic thing is that I am a therapist and nothing I have tried is working.
Thanks so much for your thoughts, if you have any to share.